The waves washed over my feet and I felt a strength I did not feel when I last let the ocean kiss my feet. Yes, something in the last year shifted deep within me and I could feel an unwavering confidence which I do not usually associate with the ocean. I enjoy being by the water, breathing in the air and opening my ears and soul to the sounds of the waves. Being in the water has never been a place of comfort for me.
This day, all I wanted was to be in the water. Every time I walked away, it beckoned me back and I have to believe that it is a sign that I have cultivated an inner strength that felt weaker a year ago. I have grown, and this is how I was able to see that growth that is so often intangible.
This shows up in my yoga asana practice as well.
A few weeks ago I was standing in my kitchen and suddenly found myself in Natarajasana. Coming into a yoga pose in a place as unsuspecting as my kitchen is quite normal for me (the other day I fit in a full 30 minutes of yin in my mother-in-law’s living room while we were hanging out). What took me by surprise was the strong desire to take a shape I typically shy away from. Natarajasana, for whatever reason, is one that my mind has programmed me to believe I do not like.
When we can trust our bodies more than our minds they will lead us to what we need.
Natarajasana evokes strength and power to me. Finding our strength while balancing on one leg, while stretching ourselves out in both directions, while creating circuits of energy between our hand and our foot as well as our fingers as they connect in jnana mudra. It necessitates taking up space, trusting that we can remain semi-still as the world keeps moving around us, believing in our own power, and knowing that we have all we need contained within us.
Maybe that day in the kitchen was a moment of Tarot-Yoga for me. Maybe I pulled that pose from somewhere deep within because I needed the medicine of what it had to offer me.
What do you know deep within you need? What might it unlock when you allow for it?